Monday, January 17, 2005
I Have Too Much Time on my Hands
Quote of the Day:It's true, I'm a Rageaholic.....I just can't live without Rageahol!
-Homer Simpson
It's true... I've just realised how much spare time I have... Either that or I waste my time doing meaningless things instead of college work. For example; after watching Bill Bailey: Part Troll I decided to read some reviews, simply to find out if critics really do comment on his appearance. These are my findings:
"Stand-up comic Bill Bailey is an amiable bloke. He could be Father Christmas's naughty nephew, his eyes twinkling the audience into submission before he even says a word. With his mad professor hair and constantly surprised pop-eyes, like some genial old Rocker who's always down the pub telling yarns about the good old days, he slyly invites you to laugh at him."
"Those who have seen him on Channel 4's 'Black Books' or BBC2's 'Never Mind the Buzzcocks' would have known pretty much what to expect: He is long-haired and beardy"
"Bill Bailey must be absolutely sick of people saying he looks like a roadie. Unfortunately for Bill, the resemblance gets closer every year. His hair - too long to be a mop, too short for a hippie - has now receded to the point where it seems glued to the back of his bare crown."
There we have it... Proof that I have too much time on my hands. But this wasn't enough... I then decided to scour the internet for The Simpsons quotes. Partly out of boredom, partly because I'm just that cool but mostly because they make me laugh. Here are some of my favourites:
Grandpa: My Homer is not a communist. He may be a liar, a pig, an idiot, a communist, but he is not a porn star.
Homer: Look, the thing about my family is there's five of us. Marge, Bart, Girl Bart, the one who doesn't talk, and the fat guy. How I loathe him.
Lionel Hutz: Well, he's kind of had it in for me ever since I accidentally ran over his dog. Actually, replace "accidentally" with "repeatedly," and replace "dog" with "son."
Homer: From now on, there are three ways to do things: the right way, the wrong way, and the Max Power way.
Bart: Isn't that just the wrong way?
Homer: Yeah, but faster!
Chief Wiggum: This is Papa Bear. Put out an APB for a male suspect, driving a... car of some sort, heading in the direction of, uh, you know, that place that sells chili. Suspect is hatless. Repeat, hatless.
Marge: Homer, is this how you pictured married life?
Homer: Yeah, pretty much, except we drove around in a van solving mysteries.
B.T.Barlow: Mr. Mayor, I have a question for you.....what if YOU came home one night to find your family tide up and gagged, with SOCKS in their mouths.They're screaming. You're trying to get in but there's too much BLOOD on the knob!!!!!
Quimby: What is your question about?
B.T.Barlow: It's about the budget sir.
Duffman: Duffman thrusting in the direction of the problem!
Grandpa: That doll is EVIL, I tells ya. Evil! Eeeeeeviillll!!!
Marge: Grandpa, you said that about all the presents.
Grandpa: I just want attention.
Hmmmm... I need to get out more.
-Homer Simpson
It's true... I've just realised how much spare time I have... Either that or I waste my time doing meaningless things instead of college work. For example; after watching Bill Bailey: Part Troll I decided to read some reviews, simply to find out if critics really do comment on his appearance. These are my findings:
"Stand-up comic Bill Bailey is an amiable bloke. He could be Father Christmas's naughty nephew, his eyes twinkling the audience into submission before he even says a word. With his mad professor hair and constantly surprised pop-eyes, like some genial old Rocker who's always down the pub telling yarns about the good old days, he slyly invites you to laugh at him."
"Those who have seen him on Channel 4's 'Black Books' or BBC2's 'Never Mind the Buzzcocks' would have known pretty much what to expect: He is long-haired and beardy"
"Bill Bailey must be absolutely sick of people saying he looks like a roadie. Unfortunately for Bill, the resemblance gets closer every year. His hair - too long to be a mop, too short for a hippie - has now receded to the point where it seems glued to the back of his bare crown."
There we have it... Proof that I have too much time on my hands. But this wasn't enough... I then decided to scour the internet for The Simpsons quotes. Partly out of boredom, partly because I'm just that cool but mostly because they make me laugh. Here are some of my favourites:
Grandpa: My Homer is not a communist. He may be a liar, a pig, an idiot, a communist, but he is not a porn star.
Homer: Look, the thing about my family is there's five of us. Marge, Bart, Girl Bart, the one who doesn't talk, and the fat guy. How I loathe him.
Lionel Hutz: Well, he's kind of had it in for me ever since I accidentally ran over his dog. Actually, replace "accidentally" with "repeatedly," and replace "dog" with "son."
Homer: From now on, there are three ways to do things: the right way, the wrong way, and the Max Power way.
Bart: Isn't that just the wrong way?
Homer: Yeah, but faster!
Chief Wiggum: This is Papa Bear. Put out an APB for a male suspect, driving a... car of some sort, heading in the direction of, uh, you know, that place that sells chili. Suspect is hatless. Repeat, hatless.
Marge: Homer, is this how you pictured married life?
Homer: Yeah, pretty much, except we drove around in a van solving mysteries.
B.T.Barlow: Mr. Mayor, I have a question for you.....what if YOU came home one night to find your family tide up and gagged, with SOCKS in their mouths.They're screaming. You're trying to get in but there's too much BLOOD on the knob!!!!!
Quimby: What is your question about?
B.T.Barlow: It's about the budget sir.
Duffman: Duffman thrusting in the direction of the problem!
Grandpa: That doll is EVIL, I tells ya. Evil! Eeeeeeviillll!!!
Marge: Grandpa, you said that about all the presents.
Grandpa: I just want attention.
Hmmmm... I need to get out more.
// posted by Paul @ 11:32 PM 
